*In a world troubled by IED and DIE, thank god for EID.
On World Humanitarian Day
*If vegetarian means vegetable eater, does humanitarian mean cannibal?
On exodus of NE people (August 2012)
*More than 110 ‘northeasterners’ have returned home following a backlash fear. Still people call their ‘homecoming’ ek-sau-dus…
*Why blame MEdia for showing what it likes to? If you want otherwise, try calling it something else. Like YOUdia…
Just like that
*One of our neighbourhood butcher’s mutton-to-be bolted. He is now looking for an escapegoat…
On currency notes found fished out of Guwahati water body (June 2012)
*We were told Assam’s wetlands were rich. Now we know they are cash-rich…
*Back to school brushing up grammar with elder son. But am not able to figure out if singular of Hawaii is Hawas…
On Earth Day
*We are lucky earth is called Earth. Imagine celebrating Ur-anus Day!
*Someday clerics will ban the production of sounds from your backside. They will call it Fartwa…
*A friend said she was on her way to Finland. Around the same time I was going to fin-land, the neighbourhood fish market.
On electronic era
*In this e-age, people hardly say ‘LOG PAAM’ (we shall meet) in Assamese anymore. They say BLOG PAAM…
On the world of cops
*An average Indian policeman’s ode to a typical Indian politician: “Ae maalik tere goondey hum, aisi ho hamaari karam, naake per chaley aur vasooli karey, taaki dhanda jaaye apni jam….
On understanding too much
*Sanskrit can make everything so ethereal and poetic. Take “Tamasoma jyotirgamaya…” for instance. A pedestrian person like yours truly would write this phrase as “Tamas ki maa Jyoti ke saath chali gayi...”
On brand names
*I’ve never understood why people flaunt a three-letter brand name on their ‘denimed’ buttocks. Arre baba, kisine tumhari LEE toh lee, pichhe pichhe aanewalon ko bataneki kya zaroorat….
*And some of those who haven’t had their backsides taken (Lee) flaunt le bhai (Levi)…
*Global car manufacturers don’t think much about using certain names for their models in India. Some virtually threaten people into buying them. For instance, kharido Hyundai VERNA…
*Or being partial to the Hindi Belt male organ. How else do you explain Sköda LAURA?
*Went to buy a Tata car the other day. The sad-looking vehicle protested – NA! NO! Na! No! Na, no! Nano!
On certain names
*After 40, most men on earth become Kashmiris – Ganjoo!
*I thought Gaza Strip was Paul ‘Gazza’ Gascoigne doing a striptease.
*Read a news headlined ‘Deepika (Padukone) experiences break-up woes’. What’s so woeful about celebrity break-ups? Don’t they meet, mate and checkmate all too often?